“You strive to be a very good Muslim. But then you meet a man who says it is possible to have a much more liberal interpretation – to have the occasional drink, to be alone with a girl. And you are that girl. And you are alone with that man. And you find yourself compromising everything you thought you believed in to be here with him. And ironically, though things feel even more uncertain in many ways than they did when your life was a nameless existence governed by the whims of your parents, you cannot resist being here.”

– Sweetness in the Belly, Camilla Gibb

That passage has always brought me at a crossroads; the differences and similarities, the definitions and contextual domains of Ishq e Haqiqi (Love for God)/ Ishq e Majaazi (Worldly Love).

Are they two sides to the same coin or two ideas as different as night and day itself?

According to a friend of mine worldly love stems from your love of God, depicting a pattern of descent from God to human.  That without loving and knowing, without believing in a Higher power you can’t begin to appreciate them for who they truly are, you can’t accept them, you can’t forgive their shortcomings, you can’t appreciate their good points; all without accepting and affirming your faith in the Creator. Though its a  very fair and true assessment, to me it carries a touch of “idealism” that I just can’t ignore.

Take for example individual “A” who is a God fearing, law abiding, “good Muslim.” Just by definition he has automatically forfeited his Worldy Love for his Love for God.

And here’s my question: how often do you see that happening? Take a look at your own life where on countless occasions instead of praying for what is best for you you’re making demands for so and so and such and such, putting conditions on love that is supposed to be pure and of a higher status. You’re basically making deals with God (if you believe in one) to grant you something in exchange for the love and worship you would bestow on Him.Where does this conditioning leave you? Would you still say that your love for God is higher than your love for this world or a specific human being? How many of us claim to be in love on a regular basis defying our parents, norms, society, sometimes even religion, just for this special someone? I’d say quiet a few. Now, would you still say that your Ishq e Majaazi stems from Ishq e Haqiqi?

I think that only exists in the ideal world where what an individual appears to be is in congruence with what an individual actually is. Of course, what an individual aspires to be is the bridge connecting the two but that’s where it ends. I believe its entirely possible for one to exist without the other as reality depicts. To say that you love someone more than God would label you as a heretic and to say you love God more than anything or anyone else would not be accepted as a realistic answer either. I’m not saying the latter isn’t possible because I’ve met my fair share of pious individuals but I’m not talking about the minority here. I want to shed light on the vast majority that fools itself each and everyday by preaching what they don’t practice giving rise to hypocrisy in every act and every action.  I think its perfectly normal for a human to exist either way where they may love God above all or may love this world above all. You can certainly condition yourself to migrate from one state to another but that depends on how well grounded your personal beliefs and values are, how important God is in your life and how important this world is to you in its present state.

And of course, the question stands: Why does loving God or someone in particular automatically translate into making a choice to turn your back on the path not chosen? Doesn’t religion allow for a balance in life? Life is never about the extremities; it wasn’t meant to be lived that way! You can’t exist in either “bubble.” And yet those belonging to either extremes refuse to accept the validity and existence of the other party. To the truly “enlightened” and “religious” those submersed in this world are heretics and to those “living in today, the NOW” the pious are “fundamentalists” and “extremists.” We can’t even agree to disagree.

And who suffers at the end? Those in the middle. The ones wanting the best of both worlds. The misunderstood.

Francis Bacon

Had I known that at the beginning of my shaky and naive journey through the past few years it might have saved me a lot of time and effort (not to mention pain and tears). However, its the irony of life that you only acquire the knowledge after you’ve lived through the experience. So many might say I wouldn’t have been who I am had I not experienced what I did. Agreed. I guess in the end it was the choices I had, the paths I traveled, the decisions I made that accumulated into whoever I am today.

But then it makes me wonder: if every step we take is the effect of a cause, is there really such a thing as “free will?”

Ahhh… the conundrums of philosophy or simply put; life!